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<script type="text/javascript">
//store the quotations in arrays
quotes = new Array();
authors = new Array();
quotes[0] = "I have a new philosophy. I'm only going to dread one day at a time.";
authors[0] = "Charles Schulz";
quotes[1] = "Reality is the leading cause of stress for those in touch with it.";
authors[1] = "Jack Wagner";
quotes[2] = "Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.";
authors[2] = "Mark Twain";
quotes[3] = "The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.";
authors[3] = "Oscar Wilde";
quotes[4] = "There's no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting.";
authors[4] = "David Letterman";
quotes[5] = "Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.";
authors[5] = "Lily Tomlin";
quotes[6] = "Sometimes the mind, for reasons we don't necessarily understand, just decides to go to the store for a quart of milk. ";
authors[6] = "Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider";
quotes[7] = "Correct me if I'm wrong, but hasn't the fine line between sanity and madness gotten finer? "
authors[7] = "George Price ";

quotes[8] = "Sanity calms, but madness is more interesting.";
authors[8] = "John Russell";

quotes[9] = "I decided that it was not wisdom that enabled [poets] to write their poetry, but a kind of instinct or inspiration, such as you find in seers and prophets who deliver all their sublime messages without knowing in the least what they mean..";
authors[9] = "Socrates (469 BC - 399 BC)";

quotes[10] = "Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.";
authors[10] = "Bill Watterson";

quotes[11] = "It is not worth an intelligent man's time to be in the majority. By definition, there are already enough people to do that.";
authors[11] = "G. H. Hardy";

quotes[12] = "An intelligence test sometimes shows a man how smart he would have been not to have taken it.";
authors[12] = "Laurence J. Peter (1919 - 1988)";

quotes[13] = "When I took office, only high energy physicists had ever heard of what is called the Worldwide Web.... Now even my cat has its own page.";
authors[13] = "Bill Clinton";

quotes[14] = "We've heard that a million monkeys at a million keyboards could produce the complete works of Shakespeare; now, thanks to the Internet, we know that is not true.";
authors[14] = "Robert Wilensky";

quotes[15] = "The 'Net is a waste of time, and that's exactly what's right about it.";
authors[15] = "William Gibson";

quotes[16] = "Do not envy a sinner; you don't know what disaster awaits him.";
authors[16] = "Bible, Old Testament";

quotes[17] = "People everywhere confuse what they read in newspapers with news.";
authors[17] = "A. J. Liebling (1904 - 1963)";

quotes[18] = "USA Today has come out with a new survey - apparently, three out of every four people make up 75% of the population.";
authors[18] = "David Letterman";

quotes[19] = "Rock music journalism is people who can't write interviewing people who can't talk for people who can't read.";
authors[19] = "Frank Zappa";

quotes[20] = "Half of the American people have never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half.";
authors[20] = "Gore VIdal";

quotes[21] = "I have always found that mercy bears richer fruits than strict justice.";
authors[21] = "Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865)";

quotes[22] = "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.";
authors[22] = "Martin Luther King Jr. (1929 - 1968)";

quotes[23] = "Deeds, not words shall speak me.";
authors[23] = "John Fletcher (1579 - 1625)";

quotes[24] = "Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.";
authors[24] = "Robert Benchley (1889 - 1945)";

quotes[25] = "Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.";
authors[25] = "Abraham Lincoln (1809 - 1865)";

quotes[26] = "If everything's under control, you're going too slow. ";
authors[26] = "-- Mario Andretti ";

quotes[27] = "A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.";
authors[27] = "- Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) ";

//calculate a random index
index = Math.floor(Math.random() * quotes.length);

//display the quotation
document.write("<DL>\n");
document.write("<DT>" + "\"" + quotes[index] + "\"\n");
document.write("<DD>" + "-- " + authors[index] + "\n");
document.write("</DL>\n");

//done
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